Ambition vs. Weakness

So it has been a long day, and already a long winter. Each time winter rolls about it seems my temper is shorter and my emotions are greater. I realize now that obviously money cannot buy you happiness or time with your father; no matter how much you try to stall and keep the time going. I am going to have to accept the fact that families aren't always conveniently next door, and we can't always be with them whenever we want to. I have learned this the hard and painful way, and am still learning this.
Well as far as the ambition side of my selected title above, my ambitions are at a stand still or a fickle fork in the road. I can accel as we all strive to, but no that side of me stays silenced in the back of my persona being portrayed as weak. We don't fraternize with positive ambition in these parts. Instead of living above the stereotype of teenagers, i conform. I decide that my youth years are better spent enjoyed, regardless of the later consequences. I am still in the state of denial but i'm working on it.
As far as family goes, i'm going to have to buck up and bear it. No matter how much i want everyone's attention i cannot have any of it if my intentions are greedy.
All that is left for me to do now is breath. Ambition will grow and become the more dominant sector of my personality and soon i will rise past that damned stereotype; prove my peers wrong while also maintaining a fun-filled social life. So readers i advise you to go clear the space of your living room floor, turn on some slow jazz, or meditation tunes and tones, and breath for a minute or two. With each breath in hold a stressful memory, thought, or problem that lies in your chest, before you; and with your outward breath release it. Let it flow past you. It no longer controls you or has the power to force tears from your eyes; now you are free. If you must go listen to bad old music that makes you cry, or any music that forces the tears of memories out; allowing your heart to let go is the way to allowing your soul to have peace. So my probable audience of most likely zero, have a wondrous november evening breathing. Night.